Click on photos to enlarge.

Pause playlist at the bottom of my blog to hear these videos — special moments from our first official day of bonding today. After 10 minutes of crying today, Batyr Han finally settled in with us exceptionally well. Enjoy!

Photos taken during Day 1 of Bonding — Tuesday, December 15, 2009 4-6 pm Almaty, Kazakhstan BH #3

I am writing these notes 36 hours after this day happened and though I said I’d remember all the details, it is hard. I can remember that Batyrhan was brought in to see us in a tiny room off of his group’s room. It was a room in between a few rooms and therefore was a passage way for the passing by of caregivers and staff. The room had a desk, and above that was a list of the children in his group and their birthdays. His schedule of classes was also listed. The children get up at 6 am and go to sleep at 9 pm, with a nap from 12-3. They are woken up so early and go to bed so late I guess to allow time for the caregivers to handle the needs of the 8 children. They are fed every 4 hours. I think there is one caregiver and one teacher in his group, though by now it looks like I have seen three different women with him. Or maybe they are all blending in together. Some of them wear medical masks so it’s hard to tell. In the room also is a high up window covered by a gauzy curtain, a small refrigerator and a hot plate. There are also lockers on the walls. The rug is an Oriental style rug. Everything seems overall sparse and clean, though far from modern.

Batyrhan was brought in by a caregiver who held him outward with his back against her chest. When he saw us, the first sign of his distress was a very heavy breathing through his nostrils, as if to try to contain himself. But hold back he could no longer do and he cried and cried and cried. The caregiver, desperate to make him stop, got down on bended knee to where I had laid out some toys on a small child’s wooden table and just started talking to him and bouncing him and shaking toys in his face, and now this one, and squeak this one and here’s this toy and that. All the while Batyrhan was distressed and crying and there was no opportunity, though I was beside them, to do any calm mothering. Finally, our translator said something to her in Russian and the caregiver got up quickly, placed Batyrhan on the floor facing us and quickly hightailed it out of there! She did come back with two candies and one Animal cracker. These candies are such that I would never ever give a child of this age, especially with all the choking fears I have after having witness severe situations with Eden and Emma. The candy was like a very hard caramel, shaped like a small tootsie roll but a very hard chew. He put the whole thing in his mouth and seemed to do fine but my heart was in my throat.

After about 10 minutes of solid crying after which I kept murmuring my concerns over his sadness, he discovered that he loved the Gumball machine toy which spits out the balls when you press a lever, donated to us here by Jen. We taught him how to use it and he eventually got the hang of the process of put balls in, press lever down and back again. He enjoyed the game where Gary would teeter the ball on the edge and then push it in.

We took out many toys but the gumball was a favorite as well as a few finger puppet books. Surprisingly bubbles did not go over so well. He did his heavy breathing a bit and then didn’t look too interested. The balloon was only interesting for a minute. But I also think that, since he liked balloons after Day 2, all this was just because everything was so new and overwhelming, and the room was distracting in a way.

As the photos show, we did manage to get some giggles and smiles from Batyrhan. What a joy to see his little teeth (8 on top and 6 on bottom — 2 molars each on top and bottom). What a joy to see bright eyes and a wide smile and adorable teeth.

I kissed his cheek for the first time today and breathed in, wondering what this boy would smell like and was happy to detect a faint scent of a baby style soap. His face could look cleaner, but he’s also eating candy and cookies. But his hair looks clean and his fingernails look clipped well.

One interesting thing I noted was that I wanted to take a peek and see what his back looked like and when I left up his 3 shirts, he whipped around so fast and pushed my hand away with strength. He did not like the touch of my hand on his bare skin, and yesterday did not like Gary to touch his leg over his tights. (Day 2 was different as he wanted to be tickled.) Soon enough, I was able to blow cool air on his back with my mouth and make him smile (he was probably boiling hot!) and by the very end of the visit, I was able to gently caress the 3 square inches of his lower back while he played happily and ignored my touch. I guess it is all about trust.

When it was time for the caregiver to come take him back, we all waved and said “paka paka” with this little arm flapping up and down. As we gathered our things, he could still see us through the open doorway of his group’s room and we looked back at him looking back at us and his arm flapped back and forth again.

I left there feeling a happiness, a sweet sadness and a relief – this little guy is going to be our boy and it’s going to work out just fine.

The post Thrilled to Introduce the Little Boy We Have Been Dreaming Of!! appeared first on Stephanie Karp.