I have definitely slowed down. My thoughts on the amazingness of adoption is still there. My intensely focused research into it is not. This is a good thing. I sort of feel like I’ve had some cold water thrown onto me. Recently I came across some websites with very unfortunate circumstances that transpired. I believe…
Author: Stephanie Karp
Strength and Conviction
My resolve is strengthening. The more I know I feel the more I can never turn back. I know too much. If I changed my mind now it would almost be as if I left my child there. The more people share with me, the more I feel connected to these parents and the more…
A Happy Heart
In the past many months, we have brought up periodically to friends and family that we are going to consider adoption. But it’s not a topic that gets brought up a lot. Perhaps because I want to keep it private where it remains a very positive thing for me. When it is brought up, I…
Reality
My father’s health is ailing and his spirits are down. I can’t imagine that there is a possibility of pursuing this and having his full support but him not being there to witness it. The other day when I was so happy to have shared this with my parents, he even asked detailed questions about…
Thoughts
My father’s spirits seem improved, more matter of fact. He will most likely have surgery after Thanksgiving. There is much to be grateful for this Thanksgiving. Yesterday I ran into my husband’s very good friend whom I have not seen in 11 months. He later told my husband that his wife is pregnant with their…
2 Steps Forward, 10 Steps Backward … And Eventually 10 Steps Forward Again
I was thinking we were getting to be closer to the same page but then there is a halt in our mental and emotional progress. I have some friends whose intentions are so well meaning, who love me dearly and want the best for us yet stories they have witnessed or heard about adoption have…
The Law of Detachment
How is it that we hear what we need to hear when we need to hear it? I left my MP3 player on while I was doing a lot in the house — checking email, baking, etc and when I finally got back to hear it, it was playing the audiobook of Deepak Chopra’s The…
Stepping Into The Dream
I wrote this on the evening of December 31, 2007. Some of this is a repeat from another entry on this blog, but I will include it as I wrote it that night. I am sitting here on New Years Eve 2007 in Georgia. Yesterday I had an experience that felt like a dream. Or…
January 10, 2008
It’s Gary’s birthday today — Happy Birthday to you! You are 47 years young and I am thankful to celebrate another year knowing and loving you and growing and nurturing our family. Months ago this was the date that Gary said he’d be willing to discuss his views on adoption. I waited months for this…
Feeling Inspired
The past few days I feel a lightness in my heart as if I know this is going to happen. I don’t feel the internal struggle any more and I definitely think that Gary is feeling it too. It has been about 10 months of actively considering adding a new child to our lives, which…