I have definitely slowed down. My thoughts on the amazingness of adoption is still there. My intensely focused research into it is not. This is a good thing. I sort of feel like I’ve had some cold water thrown onto me. Recently I came across some websites with very unfortunate circumstances that transpired. I believe they are rare, yet absolutely heartbreaking nonetheless. I had two days of feeling sort of down in regards to what I read. Nothing that makes me turn away from adoption, but rather the opposite. I think more about how desperate the conditions often are. The reality of these specific people’s situations and the tragedies that befell their children were so sobering to me. I think it was the step back I needed.
However, I still need to make a few more calls to some people I’ve met. I still do read all the emails from my yahoo groups.
I received an email about taking a child in for the holidays. It’s obviously in hopes that you’ll want to adopt that older child. I can’t imagine a child coming and having a great time with your family and you send them back to the orphanage.
This morning I told Gary about this program, how great it is, not something we would do now, but just to talk about it.
He is so sensitive my dear man. He said “We are in a position to do really great things, and it’s just so scary. But when I think about our kids and the chance for them to come to America (if they were the ones in an orphanage) I would just want to do something. Those older kids are the ones who really need help. Look into this!”
I couldn’t believe it. I hugged him and hugged him, just because he really is such a good, loving, kind hearted man. Precisely what I saw in him way back when.