Moving along

As of today, my Home Study will soon be joining my I600A application at the USCIS. Hopefully, they will receive it by Monday. I have heard it is a 4-6 week process for me to get the I171H (the *next* step in this process.) That is good news, as the web site listed months long of a wait.

So, throughout this whole process of my delays, I assumed/read/feared/worried/aquiesced to the fact that this process would take us well into 2010. However, Julie from our agency (formerly called Journey Home and now with a name change to With Hope and Love) told me that if our dossier paperwork is in by the end of April (and that seems feasible), that it should be a “paper pregnancy” of 6 months. So we’re talking October or November of 2009. I could hardly believe it!!! This child, G-d willing, actually does live and breathe in this world now. He is living in wait, hopefully having a good, safe time with all his needs met, to the best of the caregivers’ abilities. My eyes teared up yesterday when I allowed myself to wonder if he is possibly 4 months old or so? When my dear daughters were 4 months old, they were loved, coddled, kissed and squeezed, photographed, cooed at, tickled and massaged. How many times a day did I tell them I loved them? Each milestone, their roll overs, their tummy time, their ability to find their toes and (gosh!) suck on them, were marveled at. I can only hope that this Baby Boy is loved right now in the best way he is able to be loved. Once we are united, will make it up to him, all those missed kisses and hugs and sweet time, for all the days of his life.

I told Gary the timing is now almost 8 months away. The first night I told him this, his cold feet was so severe he could not talk about it. The next night, we were able to talk about the fact that we’ll have to officially tell our family when all the paperwork is officially in — so perhaps some time in May. Then, last night, we allowed ourselves to think of names … though there was not too much thinking because Gary is set on this one particular name which I never thought we’d name our child. But wow, I might just have a son with as interesting a name as Eden … Surely some will love it and many might not. But it does sort of fit with the wonder of this experience. Because I was not a fan of many negative comments regarding my joy at selecting Eden’s name, including for weeks and months after she was born, I will not be sharing this name for a while. I have to get used to it myself 😉 If Gary has so wonderfully allowed us to add to our family in this way he never imagined, my G-d, I absolutely think I can have him call his son a name he adores.