Yesterday after I picked Eden up from nursery school, I surprised her with a visit to the local playground. It was a beautiful sunny day, felt like spring here in Brooklyn, finally. I watched Eden carefully, enjoying her squeals of delight on the swing, her surprised laughter while going down the slide. She was happy. Later on, after she had gone to bed, Emma and I watched American Idol Gives Back. Gave us an opportunity to talk about charity, how we live compared to how others live. We donated $25 to the causes and I let her be part of the phone call. When Gary walked in she said “Daddy, we just helped children get clean water!!” She was so happy and proud. These are important lessons to learn.
I watched Randy Pausch on Diane Sawyer last night. A man who is dying but whose lesson to us all is on how to live. Check out his “Last Lecture” on youtube if you haven’t seen it already. It is inspiring.
Today, we began the process of clearing out the internal memory on our digital video recorder so we can begin recording again. I just put in new batteries in my audio recorder so I can begin interviewing my children again. (If you haven’t done this with your kids, try it. Even to get their cries, their babble, and then first words. They love hearing it play back and years later, to hear the progression … it’s pretty remarkable.)
Why my sudden sense of nostalgia, my desire to capture this and hold on tight? Part of this process? Or part of my own personal process? (Or simply PMS?? Hey, who knows!)
Left message for one homestudy social worker and wound up speaking for 40 minutes to one who happened to answer right away. She is originally from Brooklyn, we shared that same Brooklyn vibe. An adoptive parent herself to 4 children (now 14, 16, 17 and 21) she has a lot of experience with the process. I looked over the requirements. Lots to think about, answer, write. But many of the documents seem doable in a more timely manner, so I can actually feel like I will have made some headway soon.
I have been thinking lately — When am I officially “on the bus?” Is there a piece of paperwork, an application, or a time during this process (perhaps when the dossier is complete?) that you feel “official” or is being official when your heart says it is.
To have the next steps in my hands feels very good I have to say. My eyes tear up sometimes thinking about it. My friend Jen asked if it was because I feel a dream coming true very soon. It feels so much more complicated than that. I think my tears have a multitude of meaning — the enormity of what we are about to do, the thoughts of the children waiting, has a child been born who waits for us, the fear of the unknown, the worry over reactions of important people in our lives, the knowledge that this is a lifelong journey, not just 8 weeks to Central Asia. And yes, maybe there are some tears because a dream might soon be coming true. Tears that I have the moxie, the courage, the “chutzpah”, to follow the direction in which my heart is being led.
Okay, I was just reading your blog last night and I realized something… you and your husband looked really familiar to me and I couldn’t figure out why. Maybe just the “Jewish look” but I kept thinking I knew you…. I saw your Baby Story. Isn’t that crazy? I don’t really remember specifics, but I remember all of the Jewish ones, so I totally remember it. How funny is that!
So I am really excited for you. From reading your blog, I can tell that you are totally following your heart and that makes me really happy for you. Adopting Rylie was totally a dream come true for me. Something I remember dreaming about when I was 10 years old. I am excited to watch you follow your dreams too. It is such a wonderful expeirence, and also such an amazing opportunity for your two girls. Think about all of the life lessons they will learn along the way, and certainly while in Kazakhstan. What a special time for all of you.
It would make me really happy for Rylie to have a Jewish buddy from Kaz 🙂
Okay, I was just reading your blog last night and I realized something… you and your husband looked really familiar to me and I couldn’t figure out why. Maybe just the “Jewish look” but I kept thinking I knew you…. I saw your Baby Story. Isn’t that crazy? I don’t really remember specifics, but I remember all of the Jewish ones, so I totally remember it. How funny is that!
So I am really excited for you. From reading your blog, I can tell that you are totally following your heart and that makes me really happy for you. Adopting Rylie was totally a dream come true for me. Something I remember dreaming about when I was 10 years old. I am excited to watch you follow your dreams too. It is such a wonderful expeirence, and also such an amazing opportunity for your two girls. Think about all of the life lessons they will learn along the way, and certainly while in Kazakhstan. What a special time for all of you.
It would make me really happy for Rylie to have a Jewish buddy from Kaz 🙂
Steph,
Everytime I read one of your posts I cry. You are an amazing writer. I am so glad to hear you spoke with Regina yesterday. She is the one that does my blog for me. (that shows you how bad I am with the computer). I just sent her another update, it should be up in a day or so. Check it out.. Looking forward to finally meeting the Karp family this weekend in person.
Carolyn
Steph,
Everytime I read one of your posts I cry. You are an amazing writer. I am so glad to hear you spoke with Regina yesterday. She is the one that does my blog for me. (that shows you how bad I am with the computer). I just sent her another update, it should be up in a day or so. Check it out.. Looking forward to finally meeting the Karp family this weekend in person.
Carolyn
Steph,
Everytime I read one of your posts I cry. You are an amazing writer. I am so glad to hear you spoke with Regina yesterday. She is the one that does my blog for me. (that shows you how bad I am with the computer). I just sent her another update, it should be up in a day or so. Check it out.. Looking forward to finally meeting the Karp family this weekend in person.
Carolyn
Carolyn, thank you! So looking forward to meeting you too. Also, it was actually Regina from the blogworld (Never Say Never) with whom I had the bus discussion with 😉 I have not yet had the pleasure of meeting the other Regina. Will check your updates!
Sara, I think this is absolutely too funny that you saw A Baby Story. Makes this world seem even smaller now.
Steph
Carolyn, thank you! So looking forward to meeting you too. Also, it was actually Regina from the blogworld (Never Say Never) with whom I had the bus discussion with 😉 I have not yet had the pleasure of meeting the other Regina. Will check your updates!
Sara, I think this is absolutely too funny that you saw A Baby Story. Makes this world seem even smaller now.
Steph
Carolyn, thank you! So looking forward to meeting you too. Also, it was actually Regina from the blogworld (Never Say Never) with whom I had the bus discussion with 😉 I have not yet had the pleasure of meeting the other Regina. Will check your updates!
Sara, I think this is absolutely too funny that you saw A Baby Story. Makes this world seem even smaller now.
Steph
Wow, you are really making progress. I think when you hand over your check to the adoption agency, you will feel like you are “on the bus”!
Wow, you are really making progress. I think when you hand over your check to the adoption agency, you will feel like you are “on the bus”!
Wow, you are really making progress. I think when you hand over your check to the adoption agency, you will feel like you are “on the bus”!
wow! you made a big progress. Every step is very important and bring you close to your child, the most official will be the LOI (letter of invitation), once you have it, you know for sure you are going. I am so much looking forward to hear you got your LOI.
I cant say enough how lucky you are you have the oppotunity to be around and spend time with your children, this is so precious.
wow! you made a big progress. Every step is very important and bring you close to your child, the most official will be the LOI (letter of invitation), once you have it, you know for sure you are going. I am so much looking forward to hear you got your LOI.
I cant say enough how lucky you are you have the oppotunity to be around and spend time with your children, this is so precious.
wow! you made a big progress. Every step is very important and bring you close to your child, the most official will be the LOI (letter of invitation), once you have it, you know for sure you are going. I am so much looking forward to hear you got your LOI.
I cant say enough how lucky you are you have the oppotunity to be around and spend time with your children, this is so precious.
I am so happy to hear that you are taking steps forward and getting on the bus! 🙂
Chances are that you will never regret this decision, but it’s important to make it in your own time. We all have different comfort levels that need to be attained before we jump into something so demanding and invested as international adoption.
I’m looking forward to hearing more soon!
I am so happy to hear that you are taking steps forward and getting on the bus! 🙂
Chances are that you will never regret this decision, but it’s important to make it in your own time. We all have different comfort levels that need to be attained before we jump into something so demanding and invested as international adoption.
I’m looking forward to hearing more soon!